Essay Comments

I found the comments about my essay interesting, but they were not at all what I had expected. The one part that I did see coming was your concern that there were three parts to my essay, which I recognized and was worried might cause disjointedness. However, instead of trying to blend the sections together, you recommended reworking the first one so that it was of equal length. I suppose that it would make more sense to have three equal sections if I am going to maintain the separations. I personally would like to make more logical transitions to try to bring the reader along without confusing them each time I change topics. One of the risks I took in the paper was to come across rather forcefully which my question and answer segments, however you felt that this didn't give the reader enough time to process what I had said so I will need to rework these parts. Overall I'm still partial to the old system of inserting corrections directly into the text, but I did find the comments helpful.